My friend likens this to “backwashing.” She says that a couple needs a regular inflow of new perspective and interaction from people outside the two of them. Otherwise, their own relationship can get stale and unfulfilling. (While this may be a funny way to look at it, I think it’s true!)
The symptoms of “backwashing” include: taking each other for granted, bickering over little things, being stuck in a rut of the same activities, reluctance to be spontaneous, critical thoughts and attitudes...you get the picture.
In those times, I’ve discovered the importance of planning ahead for time with other couples. Here are a few of my favorite double-date ideas:
- Get dessert and take a walk in a park.
- Play miniature golf.
- Have a bonfire.
- Share dessert after the evening church service.
- Go to a concert or symphony.
- Visit a local attraction or museum.
- Around the holidays, gather for a potluck where each couple brings a dish to represent their unique heritage.
- Attend a local fair or carnival together.
- Make homemade pizzas together.
- Attend a theatrical performance.
- Go out for breakfast on a Saturday morning.
- Choose a book to read, and regularly meet to discuss what you’re learning.
- Engage in a common hobby—biking, hiking,
- Visit scenic areas and take photos.
- Host a theme-related dinner where each couple brings a dish (Mexican, luau, Asian, etc.).
- Plan a game night.
- Enjoy an afternoon picnic.