Broken Marriage Restored

Every once in a while, I receive messages or testimonies from women that are so exciting, I have to share them! I received this message from my friend, Ann. She led a Secrets bible study at her church and she saw first hand what can happen when a woman surrenders her whole life to God. Here's the story:

Hey Friend!

Have some cool news to share with you! Yesterday I was talking with a gal at my church that went through Secrets with me last year and she told me that she shared a copy of the book with her sister-in-law. She and her husband were in the process of a divorce and actually ended up going through with it. When she received the book she tossed it under the seat of her car and didn't want to read it. But after the divorce she started going back to church and eventually picked the book up and read it cover to cover. Said once she started it she couldn't put it down. Well to make a long story short, she and her ex-husband are back together! My friend said she repented of the things she had done that had caused problems in their marriage and decided to try to reconcile with him. Her husband said, "I don't know what was in that book but she's a different person now!" I was so excited when my friend shared that with me! I'm sure there are many more testimonies like this one :) Props again for writing this book!

Love ya!
Ann

When God Made Time

Late one night, high above the Atlantic Ocean, I was challenged by this statement, "There is always time to do the will of God." I have difficulty sleeping on overseas flights, so I turned my attention to my current devotional book. The writer asked if we agreed or disagreed with that statement. Sure. I agree--there must be enough time to do God's will. I remember the sound of the jet engine and looking out the window at the stars above and the vast waters below and questioning myself. Then why do I feel so stressed, always wishing for more hours in a day?

My husband and I were leading a missions team of 27 people from our church in Wichita, Kansas, to Ireland. While everyone else was sleeping (or at least trying to sleep) my mind was pondering that interesting statement--"There is always time to do the will of God," and all of its implications for my busyness.

We landed in Dublin and were greeted by a wonderful Irish couple, a very small bus, and two cars. We piles in the vehicles and headed to one of the most beautiful spots on the earth--Carraig Eden in Greystones, Ireland. Needless to say, the beauty of Ireland crowded out the thoughts from my devotions. I was overwhelmed by cars driving on the left side of very narrow streets, thatched roofs, brightly colored doors, sheep, and the greenest grass I'd ever imagined. Once we arrived at the Bible college, the students won our hearts and we began to work on the many tasks we had come to complete.

One of the first things we noticed was the different pace of life in Ireland. A very relational people, the Irish enjoy taking time for tea and lingering over meals. To be completely honest, this was a real challenge for many on our team. My husband went to a nearby hardware store and had to wait for 20 minutes while the owners finished visiting over their tea. We soon realized that our fast-pased American way was being challenged.

Late one evening, after a full day's work and a delicious Irish meal, several of us walked along the Irish Sea shore. We came upon a kind, elderly Irish gentlemen. His lovely accent was so captivating and his answers to our questions were so enlightening, that we stood late into the night engaging him in conversation. After an hour and a half, I thanked him for taking so much time with us. I'll never forget his response, "Oh, that's alright. When God made time, He made plenty of it."

I remember thinking, Wow, we aren't in Kansas anymore. I had never heard that statement before. As Americans, we are always hoping for more hours in the day, more days in the week, and more months in the year!

Spending those eight days in Ireland taught me a very important lesson--there is always time to do His will. So anytime I begin to feel overwhelmed, I ask myself--am I doing what He desires or am I filling my life with things I think are important? I don't want to ever forget the words and challenging truth of a kind Irishman, "Oh, that's alright. When God made time, He made plenty of it."

Make Your Mark

Here is the video that I created for the organization where I work. I wanted to share it with you!

Geniune Love

In the midst of pastoral counseling, my husband often defines love as self-sacrifice. Genuine love wants the best for others and is willing to make sacrifices for them to experience that goodness. When we look at the life of Christ, we see this picture of love in every encounter—truly putting the needs of others ahead of His own.

We may naturally think that self-sacrificing love is too costly. However, just the opposite is true. Selfish living always leaves us frustrated and unfulfilled, because self-centered thoughts tend to focus what is lacking in our life. Or we can find ourselves wanting others to live up to our expectations, causing even more dissatisfaction.

We actually rob ourselves of joy by choosing to live selfishly. Jesus tells us our joy is directly related to our choice to remain in His love and love others—

“’As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you’” (John 15:9-12, NIV).

Earlier in the book of John, we read that Jesus came to give us a “rich and satisfying life,” (John 10:10, NLT). But we are also called to serve one another in love. The two are directly related.

I pray we will remain in His love and allow self-sacrificing love to pour through our lives. I believe a rich, satisfying, joyful life will be the result!

Praying for Your Husband

Philippians 4:5-7 says, “Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (NIV)

Below is the prayer guide found in Secrets appendix. As you pray, allow the peace that God provides to guard your heart and mind.

For Your Husband

Relationship with God
Psalm 19:1-4 Pray your husband will see god at work in all creation.
Psalm 42 Pray your husband will be “thirsty for God.”
Psalm 103:1-18 Pray for your husband to experience God’s great love.
Psalm 139:1-18 Remember that this truth applies to your husband as you pray for him.
Isaiah 55 Pray your husband will seek God with his whole heart and find the satisfaction that only God can give.
Colossians 1:15-20 Pray your husband will come to know Christ as He is described in these verses.
1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 Pray your husband will live in awareness of Christ’s return.

Righteous Living
Psalm 1 Pray your husband will be a righteous and “blessed man.”
Psalm 32 Pray your husband will be quick to repent.
Proverbs 4:23-27 Pray your husband will be a man of integrity.
1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 Pray your husband will avoid sexual immorality.
Hebrews 4:12 Pray that your husband’s heart will be touched in a life-changing way anytime he hears the Word of God.

Ability as a Husband
Ephesians 5:25-33 Pray your husband’s love for you will grow to be like Christ’s.
Philippians 2:1-8 Pray your husband will serve others with a humble heart.

Wisdom for Decisions
Psalm 62 Pray your husband will place his hope and trust in God.
Psalm 86:1-7 and Psalm 107 Pray that when your husband is in trouble, he will call out to God.
Proverbs 2 Pray your husband will grow in wisdom, insight, and understanding.

If Your Husband Is Not Yet a Christian
Hebrews 11:1 Remember that faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. Have faith in God and believe for your husband’s salvation.
2 Peter 3:8,9 Remember God’s patience and His desire for your husband to come to know Him.

Transition

My husband and I are in the midst of a transition. Two weeks ago, we accepted new positions that require us to resign from our pastorate and to relocate.

We have experienced many different emotions in the past 14 days. Our kids and six-week old granddaughter live in the city we are leaving behind. We are also leaving many close relationships that developed during our 10 years in Wichita.

We know God is leading us and we are excited for our new roles. We are also saddened at the loss that accompanies this transition. This is our first move that doesn’t include our children. While they are adults, I can’t begin to put words to the emotions I am encountering at the thought of leaving them. I’m thankful we are only moving four-and-a- half hours away—we already have trips planned to see our sweet grandbaby.

In the midst of all of this transition, I’m reminded of the importance of prioritizing our marriage. It is the one relationship designed to endure every season of our adult lives. Children grow up, friends move away, and extended families rarely have the privilege of living close to one another. In the midst of so much change, God gives us marriage—a human relationship that is intended to last a lifetime.

I’m so thankful to be starting this new season with my best friend—my awesome husband! And quite honestly, I’m looking forward to this new adventure together!

I want to encourage you today to prioritize your relationship with your spouse, above any other relationship—it is meant to last a lifetime!

Mother and Daughter Lead Together

One of my friends shared her testimony with me about forming a Secrets small group. I hope her experience encourages those that are considering leading a Bible study. Here’s what Guyla said:

“Maybe it was the butterfly and the stunning pink and black graphics; maybe it was the title, Secrets: Transforming Your Life and Marriage; maybe it was the Lord. Whatever the reason, I was intrigued the first time I saw an e-mail promoting the release of this new Bible study for women. Almost immediately, I knew I needed to lead a group. I hoped my daughter, Melissa, would join me.

When I showed her the information, Melissa agreed it would be fun to lead the class together. We both felt that, as a mother/daughter team, we could bring our different perspectives to play in the group. Within a few weeks, we received approval to start the study in our church, set a date to begin, promoted the group, and developed a list of interested women. We were amazed at how quickly it all came together.

Our group wasn't large, but it was diverse. We had several young moms—one who had just left a difficult relationship. We had an engaged college student, a divorcee from an abusive home situation, and a woman experiencing challenges in a forty-year marriage. At the end of the series, the women expressed their appreciation for the class and felt it had opened their eyes to see their lives and their relationships from God’s perspective. Several expressed interest in taking the class again.

As leaders, we were continually impressed with the quality of this study. From the pre-planning information to the lessons and support materials, everything flowed together very well. The videos helped to set the pace for the easy-to-follow session plans. Gary Smalley's comments added to Kerry Clarensau's already astute teaching. The testimonies added a personal element. Discussions were a natural consequence of the many powerful “ah-ha” moments we all experienced.

Will we lead a second class of Secrets? Absolutely! We can hardly wait to see what God will teach all of us this time as we open His Word with Kerry. Without a doubt, Secrets can make a difference for women who are seeking the Lord’s answers for their lives and their marriages. The beautiful thing about God’s secrets is that they always improve our lives – and He can’t wait to share them with all of us!”